Right now in Dublin, Ireland, 350+ Racers have come together for the Awakening Conference. Five different squads have converged on one location to encounter God during a week of worship, teaching, and activation. They are hungry...and so are we.
This afternoon at 2pm EST, I hopped onto the World Race website to join the Awakening Conference streaming live from my laptop. What I experienced has left me wanting more. More of his tremendous love lavished on me. More chains being broken. More lives being healed. More nations being won. At first, I wasn't sure quite what to expect from a streaming feed as opposed to actually BEING there. Over 130 people tuned in to watch as Andrew Shearman, founder of G42 Leadership Academy gave his message on the 42nd generation and as Jonathan David Helser led the Racers in a time of prophetic worship. What amazed me about the whole experience is that I didn't have to be in the room to sense what Holy Spirit was doing. Through the viewers chatting, Holy Spirit moved and began opening hearts. People shared their struggles and ways that the enemy had been lying to them. Then FREEDOM came. It showed up through people praying for and prophesying over others. Chains were broken even in the chat room! How's that for God being omnipresent?! People were dancing and shouting and praising Jesus in Dublin as well as their living rooms. The joy of the Lord is too big to be confined to a small room in Ireland. I eagerly anticipate the next opportunity to watch and listen tomorrow morning at 5am and tomorrow afternoon at 2pm. These World Racers on the field are world-changers. They are the ones going out and meeting people where they are at, in the poverty and destitution and they are offering the life that is found in Jesus. One of freedom and one of victory. As the lyrics of one of the songs rang in my ears "there is resurrection in these veins", the truth of Christ in us flows to the nations. We are dead to sin and alive to Christ, how great is that?!
So often it's easy to chase an encounter. I've witnessed people traveling to Isreal to touch the stone at Golgatha or to sit outside the Garden of Gethsemane. Anything and everything to get near to Jesus and EXPERIENCE him. Well, here's the good news...you don't have to go anywhere to experience him. As a believer, his Spirit resides in you. What we're seeing in Dublin and on the live-stream is an outpouring of his Spirit when many gather in his name to celebrate him. O God, let us become the place where healing breaks out and where lives are changed because you CHOOSE to move and operate through us. He doesn't have to but he WANTS to because we are his body. If you aren't busy tomorrow morning at 5am or afternoon at 2pm, go
and see for yourself the generation of sons and daughters that God is raising up. It's more comfortable to sit and do nothing and talk about his Kingdom come. Sure. But can we actually play a part in it and not settle for just talking?
Thy Kingdom COME! Thy Will be DONE! On EARTH as it is in Heaven!
After a nearly two month hiatus from blogging, I have gathered my once-jumbled thoughts enough to update you on the past few months in my life...
It's been really difficult trying to grasp what exactly transpired this summer. I feel as if the memories, stresses, highs and lows all blur together. I was eager to head down to Haiti and catch a glimpse of what God is doing there in the aftermath but I found myself realizing more and more that God had something in store for me in all of it. I got broken. I hit an emotional tipping point that I've never experienced before and I learned the value of staying connected to the source for your identity's sake. Miscommunication, confusion, frustration, plans A, B, and C falling through were constant themes throughout the entire summer. It became easier and easier to feel like I was failing or letting someone down and my weakness of people-pleasing was exposed. What's interesting about all of this is that I know that no matter how much I wanted to think I was the reason for things not going according to "plan", God had those things in mind all along. I now know something that I did not see in the midst of everything.
I cannot thwart his plans no matter how much I think I'm the culprit.
Breakthrough came. I spent the summer with some amazing men and women of God who dove into community on a whole new level. A group of people who desire nothing more than to make each other great and to go after the things that are on the heart of God. Four of us (Matt Ruple, Seth Jr, Neil Bruinsma, and I) will be moving to Gainesville to work for AIM in various capacities this next year along with pursuing some different ideas as a team. Throughout the summer these guys challenged me and encouraged my spirit in the midst of tremendous frustration with setup.
I also had the opportunity to fly out to Thailand at the end of June to meet up with the J-squad as they celebrated their final debrief. After spending four months with them on the field, it was incredible to see where God had taken them by the end of that 11-month journey. I saw a transformed group. A people who walked through the fire of refinement in order to step into the calling that God has on their lives. I'm excited to see what God has in store for them as they continue in this next season and I know that they will be difference-makers in this world.
As for me, I will continue on staff with the World Race for the next year as a part of the logistics team. I am stepping into a new role on setup which currently requires me to pave the way in Central and South America for the upcoming squads as well as becoming the active field support role for our current squad logistics people. I will be staying in office mostly and basing out of the AIM headquarters. I feel like the Lord has been speaking to me about building and fostering different friendships that I haven't invested in for a long time. In order to do that, it has become clear that I need to rest from traveling so much and stay put in one location.
As far as what's next, I've begun studying for the GMAT in preparation for business school next fall. I am planning on pursuing an International MBA in economic development or entrepreneurship. I'd like to continue in ministry to the nations by creating opportunities for ideas to take off through micro-enterprise and other avenues and I feel like this is the next step toward that. I'd like to ask for your continued partnership both financially and prayerfully as I seek the Lord through this next season in my work with the World Race. As the World Race continues to grow and expand, the need for workers becomes greater and greater and I hope to play a part in getting people on board with the movement.
For this next month, I will be meeting with supporters and seeking out new partners in ministry so that I can walk into this next year without worry of support coming in. It's a faith-walk, but he never fails to provide and he never ceases to amaze me in his goodness and favor.
This is taken from my covenant brother Seth Barnes' blog. I just thought I'd share it with you and perhaps encourage you just how much God is about our relationships with people. Anyway, here it is:
A few weeks after the earthquake hit in Haiti,
I started talking with people about their experiences down here. My dad told me about
the spiritual shift the country had taken and remarked how incredible
the Haitians' posture was toward God. Especially after so many had been
dedicated to voodooism.
I read blogs like this
one and this
one that broke my heart and caused something to rise up from within
me, demanding that "Things should not be this way!"
Eventually
I made plans to come here for the summer to be a part of what God was
doing. I looked forward to getting involved in the community of leaders
here, I looked forward to participating on a World Race relief trip for
the month of June, and I looked forward to helping a people in need.
Above all of this, though, I looked forward to exploring new depths in
my covenantal relationship with Aaron Bruner.
When
I say covenantal, I mean mutual dedication and commitment for life; I
mean preferring each other above ourselves; I mean Jonathan and
David.
We started down this road together a little over two
years ago while in Swaziland on the World Race. Check out what
Aaron wrote about it then. Neither of us really knew what we were getting ourselves into, but we
knew in our spirits it was right. For the rest of the race we supported
each other and spurred each other on... at least some. We tried to be
uplifting and see the best in each other. Looking back, though, I think
we were both dealing with a lot of issues individually and weren't in a
place to be able to invest fully in our relationship. It was like we
were running headspead along a road filled with potholes, blind.
Fortunately, though, we serve a gracious and loving God!
After
the race, we kept in touch pretty well, but only as good friends. After
nearly two years, though, I began to feel anxious about us coming
together to build our relationship again. Just like I knew in my spirit
that this was right in Swaziland, I knew it was right that we come back
together for a time.
The Lord looked out for us through it all.
We were paired together to guide this community of Short Term Missions
leaders here and looked forward to the partnership. As the WR relief
trip approached, a ministry contact fell through, which led the way to a
team being dropped and me being taken back to partner with Aaron on the
World Race side of things as well.
Since coming here, it's been
clear that Aaron sees the best in me. He encourages me, he instructs me,
he supports me and he promotes me. I'm convinced he really does want
what's best for me and will look out for me, even at his own expense. I
strive to do the same.
When I sit back and think about all of
this, I realize how blessed we are to have this at twenty-five years
young.
What an adventure life is! It's one my greatest joys to go
through it with such an honorable, passionate, faithful and inspiring
man.
The man flogged him relentlessly. The belt violently thrashed the boy's flesh provoking a steady stream of tears as we sat in the back of our pick-up unsure of the "right" thing to do. Moments before, this child was smiling and laughing as we communicated through our jumbled Creole and English phrases. Upon seeing him speaking to us, his brother charged onto the scene, belt in hand, and unleashed fury on this child. Matt, one of our team leaders, hopped off of the pick-up but immediately paused after witnessing blow after blow slapping the little boy. I remember thinking, what do we do?
As much as Matt or I wanted to jump into the middle and stop the beating, the thought of knowing that this kid still had to go home interrupted any notion of breaking the abuse. We were caught in the middle of injustice with our hands tied. If we stopped it now, he could get it worse later. If we didn't stop it, we were forced to watch it and have those images seared into our minds. Never before have I witnessed such intense rage and passion released on an innocent child. I was crushed. His face winced with each blow, and the bruises formed instantly. His skin was battered and broken. My body cringed and shivers went up and down my spine. I was perplexed and had no idea what to do. Somehow prayer didn't seem like enough. Is that going to stop this? I mean, maybe in the long run, but right now? HELPLESSNESS...
As we rode home the other day, after mobilizing 50 WR Relief Trippers, we stopped by the Haitian White House for some quick snapshots. It seems that no matter where you are in Haiti, if you're an American, you stick out like a sore thumb. The perception is that every American is rich and has money to give out...ALWAYS. So each day that we are out and about, we are easily targeted and bombarded by hungry people. And who can blame them really? So as we sat in our vehicle, a few small children scarcely clothed approached us shouting "give me dollar, give me dollar." I've been in this same exact situation countless times. I've heard the cries of the poor asking for money or for food and my response is always the same.
We are told to not give money to anyone. Why? Because the ensuing mob that thrusts themselves upon you is overwhelming and fights tend to break out when they see that handouts are being given. Sure enough, we did not give them money, but we did give one child a loaf of bread. Chaos erupted. Kids were climbing on the back of our vehicle, pushing and shoving, doing anything they could to get close to the people handing out food. One child climbed straight over top and lunged toward another loaf of bread and my gut reaction was to grab his wrist and say NO. That's when it hit me.
I've been conditioned to serve when things are convenient. We have "scheduled" ministry time, and that's the time we love on orphans or do feeding programs. When they approach us, however, we're told to just say no as if it's a crime to give to give handouts to a begging person. Maybe it's just the American mindset. Maybe I just want to feel good because I'm doing good on my time and not when it's really hard for me to give. Somehow I don't think Jesus did that. In fact, he says:
For I was hungry and you gave me nothing to eat, I was thirsty and you
gave me nothing to drink, I was a stranger and you did not invite me in,
I needed clothes and you did not clothe me, I was sick and in prison
and you did not look after me.' They also will answer, 'Lord, when did
we see you hungry or thirsty or a stranger or needing clothes or sick or
in prison, and did not help you?' He will reply, 'I tell you the truth,
whatever you did not do for one of the least among you, you did not do
for me.' ~Matthew 25:42-45
Strong words. Even though I've seen this before, I realize that my heart is positioned differently. What would it look like if I literally gave everything I had? I mean, think about it, give all of the food out, then when they needed clothes, give the clothes off of my back. I know this may sound extreme but I never once read anywhere that Jesus turned people away when they asked. How did he handle the intense needs of the poor? How did he tame the mobs of people who were in such great need? I am perplexed right now. I keep seeking the Lord to understand why I respond the way that I do and why I don't just GIVE. I think there's more to this, I just don't have the answers right now. I don't want to turn a deaf ear anymore to the cries of the poor just because it's not convenient. God show me what it means to be uncomfortable. Show me what it means to give until I have nothing.
Where were you when 9/11 happened? Or when Hurricane Katrina ravaged New Orleans? What about Port-au-Prince? Can you remember where you were or what you were doing at the time?
I was sitting in my 12th grade English class when the first plane struck the World Trade Center. The bell had rung and I rushed to my next class to see that image staring at me from the TV screen. I sat perplexed and dazed, completely unaware of what the following moments would entail. As the story unraveled and the other planes crashed, I couldn't help but wonder what it must have been like to actually be at the scene when it occurred. Those same thoughts raced through my mind as stories of Hurricane Katrina and the Haiti Earthquake plastered the news. What were the people feeling? What did they see? And...where was God in all of it?
Did he turn a blind eye to the suffering and the screams of these people? I've been starting to wonder...where were you God?
Tonight I met a man. He was younger, full of life and joy and genuinely passionate about his work. He greets everyone with an endearing smile and it's safe to say that he has some serious charm. As this man began to open up and share his story, I soon realized that his story contained many answers to these nagging questions that have been plaguing me.
Before the earthquake this guy had come to Haiti in hopes of God revealing some life-altering purpose. He had been working with an organization digging latrines in the Petit Guave area, hardly the dream he had imagined would change his life.
He began asking God, "is this it? Did I really come to Haiti to dig latrines? Will you show me what it is you have for me here?"
January 12th, 2010 began like any other day I would imagine. No doubt he made his breakfast, brushed his teeth, and headed off to do the Lord's plumbing. After completing his task, he even managed to play some soccer with some of the locals. During a break in their game, the sky begin to turn black. As he explained it, a large flock of birds flew into the sky blotting out the sun at the exact same time...
Where were you when the earthquake in Haiti hit?
The very next moment, he experienced a sudden drop as if the entire earth beneath him completely sunk instantaneously. There was a slight pause as everyone stared in awe. Then, in what could only be described as the loudest of groans, the earth trembled and quaked as screams echoed from the surrounding mountains. The ground moved with such fluidity as if it was an ocean wave cresting and tossing unassuming bystanders up into the air and thrashing them back to the ground. He related the image of one of his translators being taken up into the air and crashing into another man who was thrown by the earth. Two men hit the ground, only one stood up. This man, who experienced it firsthand, was himself thrown against a wall and blacked out momentarily. When he rose, the earth still trembled as he made his way through the chaos and yelling. He explained the vast numbers of people that he saw strewn across the ground lifeless and covered and in a deep crimson color but his gaze became fixed on one small 7-year-old girl trapped beneath the rubble.
At that moment, he prayed for supernatural strength to lift the burdensome rock that trapped this poor child. He tried and tried but the weight was too heavy. He then tried to pull the child but with each tug, the girl shrieked in terror and pain. He told us that with each aftershock, he would run off and come back and check on her to see that she was still alive. She would tug on his arm not to leave. So he sat. He sat there gazing into her eyes as he held her close. He prayed over her and continued to hold her as life instantly changed. The next morning he squeezed her fist as hard as he could to illicit a response, any response at all. Nothing. Life had been taken from this sweet child.
Anger and sadness filled this man. Purpose that he had sought out before arriving in Haiti didn't seem to make sense after such an intense tragedy. He told story after story about the ensuing days and how with each quake it seemed more lives that were close to him were lost. He recounted children with missing arms and legs that would scream for their mothers. His dreams were filled with blood-stained memories that kept him up at nights vomiting over the images he saw. Tears streamed from his eyes as his voice quivered,
"God, where were you?"
As he told us about the people that he accompanied during their final breaths, it clicked that God was there all along. In the midst of such devastating and crushing events, Jesus was there to hold the hand of the dying girl. Jesus helped these children with missing limbs search for their parents and get medical attention. This man represented the body of Christ aiding and serving the broken and hurting. He put himself in harm's way to see others restored. That is who Jesus is and exactly what he did. Through this man's trail of tears, I have seen that God does not abandon people or turn a blind eye to them in the time of greatest need. God's Spirit was present so that others may see him and today I met the man who was there when the earth groaned in Port-au-Prince.
Sleep deprivation, tenting in ninety degree weather, long transatlantic flights, mosquito-swarmed locations, bucket showers with cold water, and the question of "am I really making a difference?". This is just a short list of reasons why someone like me would contemplate every bit of the last three years. Was it all worth it? Is God really in this?
I began this whole journey in January 2007 which seems forever ago at this point. I submitted my application to the World Race in search for something. I knew I'd be graduating that spring and I hadn't the slightest clue of where I was headed next. I honestly didn't think I would be accepted, let alone have some life-altering experience but God somehow managed to do both. Sure, I thought it would be an adventure, I'd go bungee-jumping or scale some breathtaking mountains and I knew that I'd be among extreme poverty. But this was only one year of my life right? Then I could get back to what I was doing before....right?
I now find myself three years later preparing to go to Haiti for the third time this year. I read books on social justice and the church's responsibility to meet the needs of the poor and destitute. I search the scriptures for hope and I read how Jesus spent his time on earth with the sick and the hurting and something stirs in my spirit that never did before this whole crazy experience. I think differently. It's as if someone removed the brain and heart that I once had and replaced it with something totally and completely different. Why am I doing this? There are moments when I sit and reflect on all that has transpired but the only answer that comes is one that I occasionally forget. Christ in me, the hope of glory.
When a starving orphan stares hopelessly into your eyes and finds love for the first time. I mean, real genuine love: Christ. When people have lost everything, house, family, stability, and they receive aid in rebuilding what was lost: Christ. When one single believer in an entire city shares the news and hope of a savior and redeemer and their number is multiplied: Christ. And when a dying single mother loses her youngest child but receives love from one who will never leave her or forsake her: Christ.
I don't understand sometimes why God has me where I am. But I am now realizing that it probably has something to do with him establishing his presence in dark and hopeless places. I GET to do this. I GET to be Jesus to these people. After seeing and experiencing so much in recent years, I tend to get overwhelmed with the world's problems. How can I possibly do anything meaningful or significant? I've heard it said once that if I was the only one in the world that Jesus would STILL have died and risen just for me. Is that true? I believe it is. And because I believe it, it changes everything. If there was only one orphan in the entire world, I would still go and hold them and pour love into their life. If there was only one person who lost everything in Haiti, I would still go and help rebuild what was lost. If there was only one mother who lost a child, still...
He's about the ONE, so I'm about the ONE. He's the restorer and the one who reconciles. That's why I am doing this. If I allow myself to become overcome with all of the world's problems, it would be easy to curl up and do nothing but God is doing something in me. I realize that I've had the opportunity to encounter more the one person in my life and I'm sure there will be more, but the focus remains the same; keeping my eyes on the One and for the one.
This is a true testament to how God restores, redeems and rains down his goodness over those he loves. He is close to the broken and marginalized, the impoverished and destitute. He answers prayers in a way that far exceeds our understanding. Praise him for that!
This is going to be more or less an update blog. Being that I didn't have great internet in Haiti, I was unable to really share what was going on but I'm going to do my best to give you some insight into this past month for me.
In my last blog I mentioned the long cross-country trek that I made in a rickety van from Santo Domingo to Port-au-Prince. I arrived safely and immediately jumped into planning for the WR June Relief trip and the July squad logistics. Throughout the month, I met with quite a lot of pastors and ministry contacts that we would be working with for the summer months. I have to say, God opened doors in ways that I could never have imagined. I truly felt like he had ordained my steps. People were just so open to the vision and we were excited to hear their dreams for reaching their people. Needless to say, the World Race teams are in for a real treat when they head to Haiti this summer. These people are on fire and are expectant of the Lord's movement in their nation.
I spent a lot of time also with the STM program that was on the ground in Port-au-Prince. Seeing as how this will be my community over the summer, it was extremely important for me to get to know them and invest time in community. I brought my guitar down mainly for personal time with Jesus, but it turned out to be a huge blessing. I was asked to lead worship several times for the incoming STM teams and it brought me such joy. I love being used by God to cultivate an environment and atmosphere of worship. Matt Redman says in one of his songs to "let worship be the fuel for mission's flame". It is so true. When we are able to get on board with God's agenda through entering into worship, I believe we truly start seeing things the way that he sees them. We gain vision. So it is something that I very much find necessary in the mission field.
I visited several orphanages, made friends with some translators, and prayed with pastors. I heard their needs. I heard their hearts for their own people. I am so thrilled that we get to be the CHURCH to these people. God is the only one who gives hope, yet he chooses to use his body to accomplish his purposes on this earth. What a tremendous honor and joy it is to serve him! God has given me a heart for the Haitians and I can't wait to get back down there.
Tomorrow I travel to reunite with the J-squad. I have been looking forward to this day ever since I left them on December 2nd. I pray that it will be a time of fun, fellowship, exhortation, and renewal. I get to spend a whole week with them praise God! After that, I will return home to prepare for the summer. I will be contacting our ministry partners in Haiti, making final adjustments, and spiritually preparing. I am hopeful and expectant to see God move in mighty ways, he always does. Thank you for all of your prayers and encouragement as I continue on this journey. May God bless you all and I look forward to blogging more upon my return from Thailand!
I'm pretty sure I get the meaning of "greeting each other with a holy kiss" now. Thanks God...
Two days ago I finally made my way over to Port-au-Prince from Santo Domingo. It was the longest 10 hour drive of my life including a 3-hour road block at the border, over 1000 speed bumps (you think I'm exaggerating), and heavy heavy traffic in Port-au-Prince. Needless to say, I was exhausted after the long journey and was thankful to finally get in my tent and pass out.
The very next day, Liz, Teri and I traveled to the Fleury Foundation Orphanage (you can see before pictures here) in Leogane, just outside of Port-au-Prince. This is an orphanage that has literally lost everything. Before the earthquake hit, they ran an advanced medical clinic complete with an ambulance, a bakery, housing for over fifty children, a church, and a school. All of these buildings were completely destroyed and left in ruins. Liz and Teri were doing some work for Children's Hope Chest while I was trying to see how the World Race could get involved. When we finally met the children, each one of them (51 girls and 2 boys) came up and gently kissed our cheeks saying hello. At first, I thought it was really cute after about twenty of them had puckered up, then I just became overcome with their love. It was quite an incredible experience and I instantly connected with them. They were just too precious.
Pastor Kelly then accompanied us to the various sites that had been crushed, recounting the stories of what happened during the earthquake. He showed us the former building that housed all of the children...completely in ruins. All that remained in the wake was a hat and dress draping over the rubble. We proceeded to ask why that was there and here's what he told us...
The day the earthquake hit, the children were out in front of the building sitting down or playing around. One of the house mothers was on the 2nd floor with two of the children as the building came crashing down. She jumped to protect them, hovering over them, agonizing in pain as the walls crumpled on top of her. The children crawled out of the rubble barely scraped while the mother laid there, body beaten and weakened by the blow. She knew that the children had made it safely out as she took her final breaths beneath the rocks. She laid her life down for these sweet sweet babies. This hat and dress were hers. They are a reminder to them of her sacrifice. The way she gave her life as Jesus did, so that others might live. That is a true testimony of God's love for these children. I was blown away by this story...and yet...there are still more and more out there just like this.
To see these little girls after such a tragedy with the ability and capacity to love so greatly is God's grace in action. Although the focus and attention of the world seems to turn away from Haiti these days as other world news takes precedence, these sweet children still show love to us. Foreigners. Strangers. It doesn't matter to them. They smiled from ear to ear welcoming our presence. We were able to get all of their bio information and we gave out some gifts that Teri brought down with her. We prayed for them, laughed with them, and took lots of pictures. We are hoping and praying for God to send more workers and aid down here to get places like this back on their feet. These children have nothing to sleep on and rainy season is coming soon. Food is super expensive now and it's just harder to feed fifty children with the supply that they have.
I am so thankful for this experience. I pray that your heart is continually moved for these people even though the media's eyes are shifting elsewhere. They are still in such desperate need. We felt a tremor yesterday that terrified these kids. I couldn't imagine living every day in such fear. But that's their reality. Pray for these children as they continue to rebuild what was lost.
To find out how you can continue to support me and the ministry that we're doing down here, visit these sites:
There's a verse that I've probably heard more than the familiar John 3:16. It is Romans 8:28 which states:
ALL things work together for the good of those who love him and are called according to his purpose.
Now, I've typically heard this verse from friends and family in times when I was stressed about something or in times of trouble. In fact, I even use it to encourage others more often than not. Does it get old and repetitive? Yes, but only because I realize just how much of the Bible I don't know when it is chock-full of encouraging and life-giving verses. It just makes me long for more and more intimacy with him and his Word. Upon second thought, however, I realize that this verse has been somewhat thematic in my life.
Recently, God has really blessed me through my family and friendships. My family has always supported me through everything I do and have constantly encouraged me even in through the most difficult and challenging times. He really has worked things all out for his good. For instance, last August before leaving on the World Race the second time, my harddrive crashed on my laptop. It was so frustrating as I was leaving in just two days. But through my sister Bethany's love and support, she kindly lent her computer for my use as I'd be blogging out on the field. He used HER to complete his purposes and work things for the GOOD according to his purpose as I'd be ministering to so many people through my blogs. He brought it into alignment.
I already mentioned in a previous blog how God provided through my friend Sarah for me to go to Haiti in January and how my old high school covered my ground costs. Seriously, God knew the work that would be done in Haiti and he worked it out once again. But this time, he blended two familiar stories into one as I prepare to leave for Haiti on Tuesday.
I'm a few days away from leaving for Haiti again when my sister's computer crashes. This is now the second computer right before I'm about to leave for the field. Needless to say, I was frustrated and discouraged. I asked God why in the world did this have to happen again? I'm not under warranty with either of the computers so the costs to repair it would be expensive to say the least. Money which I DO NOT have. Well, here's where God's amazing plan just baffles me. I have a friend who works with computers. He not only replaced the harddrive with one that holds twice the amount of memory for free but installed the newest operating system for free as well. As far as the other crashed computer, it is getting sent in for repairs for a price CONSIDERABLY less than what I would have had to do without connections. And as if God hadn't blessed me enough, this friend also gave me his tent for use in Haiti as well because I had to ditch mine after a violent time battling Irish weather last year. So even in the most frustrating and discouraging hour, God says, "See Aaron, even this I will work for good. Two crashed computers and no tent, pff, no problem"
And it's so true. Isn't he marvelous in that way??? I'm blown away by his goodness and his meticulous design.
So I thought I'd share that story as I prepare for my departure on Tuesday. I can't wait to get back down to Haiti and see how he is moving down there. I will be working closely with the STM (Short Term Missions) department in Port-au-Prince while I will be setting up for the World Race June Relief Trip and the July squad launch over the summer. I will be there until March 25th and I look forward to blogging some stories from there. After that, I'll be reuniting with the J-squad in Thailand for a debrief!!! So excited about that. Praise God for his goodness and bringing ALL things together for good.
This afternoon at 2pm EST, I hopped onto the 
So often it's easy to chase an encounter. I've witnessed people traveling to Isreal to touch the stone at Golgatha or to sit outside the Garden of Gethsemane. Anything and everything to get near to Jesus and EXPERIENCE him. Well, here's the good news...you don't have to go anywhere to experience him. As a believer, his Spirit resides in you. What we're seeing in Dublin and on the live-stream is an outpouring of his Spirit when many gather in his name to celebrate him. O God, let us become the place where healing breaks out and where lives are changed because you CHOOSE to move and operate through us. He doesn't have to but he WANTS to because we are his body. If you aren't busy tomorrow morning at 5am or afternoon at 2pm, go 
It's been really difficult trying to grasp what exactly transpired this summer. I feel as if the memories, stresses, highs and lows all blur together. I was eager to head down to Haiti and catch a glimpse of what God is doing there in the aftermath but I found myself realizing more and more that God had something in store for me in all of it. I got broken. I hit an emotional tipping point that I've never experienced before and I learned the value of staying connected to the source for your identity's sake. Miscommunication, confusion, frustration, plans A, B, and C falling through were constant themes throughout the entire summer. It became easier and easier to feel like I was failing or letting someone down and my weakness of people-pleasing was exposed. What's interesting about all of this is that I know that no matter how much I wanted to think I was the reason for things not going according to "plan", God had those things in mind all along. I now know something that I did not see in the midst of everything. 
Eventually
I made plans to come here for the summer to be a part of what God was
doing. I looked forward to getting involved in the community of leaders
here, I looked forward to participating on a World Race relief trip for
the month of June, and I looked forward to helping a people in need.
Above all of this, though, I looked forward to exploring new depths in
my covenantal relationship with 
As he told us about the people that he accompanied during their final breaths, it clicked that God was there all along. In the midst of such devastating and crushing events, Jesus was there to hold the hand of the dying girl. Jesus helped these children with missing limbs search for their parents and get medical attention. This man represented the body of Christ aiding and serving the broken and hurting. He put himself in harm's way to see others restored. That is who Jesus is and exactly what he did. Through this man's trail of tears, I have seen that God does not abandon people or turn a blind eye to them in the time of greatest need. God's Spirit was present so that others may see him and today I met the man who was there when the earth groaned in Port-au-Prince. 
I began this whole journey in January 2007 which seems forever ago at this point. I submitted my application to the World Race in search for something. I knew I'd be graduating that spring and I hadn't the slightest clue of where I was headed next. I honestly didn't think I would be accepted, let alone have some life-altering experience but God somehow managed to do both. Sure, I thought it would be an adventure, I'd go bungee-jumping or scale some breathtaking mountains and I knew that I'd be among extreme poverty. But this was only one year of my life right? Then I could get back to what I was doing before....right?
I don't understand sometimes why God has me where I am. But I am now realizing that it probably has something to do with him establishing his presence in dark and hopeless places. I GET to do this. I GET to be Jesus to these people. After seeing and experiencing so much in recent years, I tend to get overwhelmed with the world's problems. How can I possibly do anything meaningful or significant? I've heard it said once that if I was the only one in the world that Jesus would STILL have died and risen just for me. Is that true? I believe it is. And because I believe it, it changes everything. If there was only one orphan in the entire world, I would still go and hold them and pour love into their life. If there was only one person who lost everything in Haiti, I would still go and help rebuild what was lost. If there was only one mother who lost a child, still...
In my last blog I mentioned the long cross-country trek that I made in a rickety van from Santo Domingo to Port-au-Prince. I arrived safely and immediately jumped into planning for the WR June Relief trip and the July squad logistics. Throughout the month, I met with quite a lot of pastors and ministry contacts that we would be working with for the summer months. I have to say, God opened doors in ways that I could never have imagined. I truly felt like he had ordained my steps. People were just so open to the vision and we were excited to hear their dreams for reaching their people. Needless to say, the World Race teams are in for a real treat when they head to Haiti this summer. These people are on fire and are expectant of the Lord's movement in their nation. 
The very next day, 
To see these little girls after such a tragedy with the ability and capacity to love so greatly is God's grace in action. Although the focus and attention of the world seems to turn away from Haiti these days as other world news takes precedence, these sweet children still show love to us. Foreigners. Strangers. It doesn't matter to them. They smiled from ear to ear welcoming our presence. We were able to get all of their bio information and we gave out some gifts that Teri brought down with her. We prayed for them, laughed with them, and took lots of pictures. We are hoping and praying for God to send more workers and aid down here to get places like this back on their feet. These children have nothing to sleep on and rainy season is coming soon. Food is super expensive now and it's just harder to feed fifty children with the supply that they have.